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Goodnight Dental Office

Rants from the Dental Operatory:  It was one of those hellish Mondays.  When you think you have it all together for the week and in the blink of an eye…..(or more like when a huge case won’t seat)….it all goes to crap.  You start to run behind, you get stressed, your staff wonders if they should get you hot tea or a Long Island iced tea to help you relax.  Regardless…..you get through it….staff goes home….and you are basking in the solitude of a quiet, empty office.  You do a quick walk thru to make sure everything is in order so you can repeat this same craziness in less than 12 hours.  Sometimes, after a bad day, it is hard to just “leave it all at the office”….you bring that stress home with you…and that is not good.  That should really be our family time to decompress and focus on the joys of being a mom.  I think of those precious moments in the past when I would lay with my kids in bed at night….reading them a story to calm their mind, clear their head….so that they can let go of their troubles of the day and relax.  Ladies….we need that too.  One of the classic books I am sure we have all read to our kids is Goodnight Moon…..so, I took cue from our past bedtime routine ……I modified it a bit…..and this is OUR dental version…to help all of us calm our minds…..and leave the angst of the dental office behind us as we head home to what truly matters.

 

Goodnight Dental Office

 

In the great dental room

There was a sense of doom

And a red bloody gauze

And a picture of……

ANUG….that made me pause.

 

And there were three little lidocaines… dulling tooth pains….

And two gnarly root tips….

And a pair of numb lips!

And a little abscess….

And a periodontal mess.

 

And a crabby patient complaining with a mouth full of goo

And a quiet overworked dentist who was whispering “f*ck you”.

 

Goodnight dental office…

Goodnight op…

Goodnight patient who drinks too much pop.

 

Goodnight extractions…

And the red bloody gauze…

Goodnight wisdom teeth with limited opening jaws.

 

Goodnight gingivitis and nasty breath that stinks…

Goodnight to the office stresses that cause me to drink.

 

Goodnight composites…

Goodnight bond…

Goodnight everything in endo (of which I am not fond).

 

Goodnight instruments…

Goodnight drills…

Goodnight dumbass patients….who don’t pay their bills.

 

Goodnight people who constantly tell me how much they hate…

And goodnight to inconsiderate patients who think its acceptable to be late.

 

Goodnight cavities…

Goodnight teeth that rot…

Goodnight to phobic patients who are scared of the shot.

 

Goodnight dentures…

Goodnight crowns…

Goodnight all those deafening handpiece sounds.

 

Good night to the 6 unit bridge that I couldn’t get to fit…

And goodnight to the understanding patient who then heard me say “Oh, shit.”

 

Goodnight lab slips…

Goodnight charts…

Goodnight high speed suction that sucks up our farts.

 

Goodnight EOBs…

Goodnight insurance plan…

Goodnight to all the assholes who assume your dentist is a man.

 

Goodnight to the patients who are needy and want more…

Goodnight to my soul and motivation which has crashed to the floor.

 

Goodnight stone models…

Goodnight lab work…

And goodnight to the Monday morning patient who always acts like a jerk.

 

Goodnight staff who relentlessly fight…

Goodnight squirmy kids who constantly bite…

And goodnight to the annoying patients who think Dr. Google is always right.

 

Goodnight ops…

Goodnight fees…

And goodnight all dental things I see…

And goodnight to the tired overworked dentist now whispering “F*ck me”.

Goodnight office

Goodnight chair

Goodnight dentists everywhere.